Bizarrely had one of my best night's sleeps for about two months last night. I put this down to the fact that I prefer certainty to uncertainty (me embrace change? what ever gave you that idea?) even where that certainty isn't the best outcome possible. Knowing what I know now effectively allows me to start planning the rest of my life whereas before yesterday I couldn't do that. To be fair I won't know every last detail of what lies ahead until after I've spoken to the oncologist on Friday (and probably not even then) but it will be enough for me to make plans. Not sure what those will be yet but should they turn out to be "sit on my sofa and not communicate with anyone in the outside world" then that is what I will do. Sorry if this upsets you. Rest assured I will not do anything to deliberately upset anyone but neither will I live the life someone else believes I should live or would want me to live. This may also include refusing treatment to give me a few extra months. The quality of my life it what matters to me most now rather than the quantity.
Having said all the above (which really is the worst case scenario) my priorities for my remaining months are likely to include (in no particular order) -
* Friends
* Family
* Cinema
* Shopping
* Trees
* Design
* Vodka martinis
* Sorting out my will and funeral details
* The theatre
* All 3 Hobbit films (I do hope I have enough time for all 3)
* My sofa, telly, favourite box sets, PS3
* Art
* This blog and you, dear readers
* Cities
New ones may well occur to me. I'll keep you posted.
It was suggested to me this week by a very dear friend that I should consider publishing this blog. A notion I'm not attracted to a) because I don't think its interesting enough for people who don't know me b) I wouldn't want to make money out of it anyway and c) knowing it was going to be published would change the way I wrote it (which may or may not be a bad thing!). Anyway, I won't be looking into that but would rather leave the blog online and as a memorial to my life and friends. I'm not sure how long Blogger.com keep these things online. Presumably if there's been a long period of inactivity they remove the blog? I should maybe look into that and task someone with logging on once a year so it remains in place? I'll have a think about that. Or maybe I would need to set up my own web address to keep it going? If anyone knows the answer to these questions then please let me know.
Today was a good day though. Went to the Trough of Bowland with DD to look at the trees which are magnificent at this time of year. We had lunch at an Inn whose name I've forgotten but which has a set of stepping stones at the back across a wide (but shallow) river. And yes, of course I walked across them and back again because I'm a boy. DD didn't because she isn't (and was in heels). Lunch was lovely and then it was back into Manchester to meet a team member, his wife and child - the very adorable William who is 18 months old and just a delight. Eventually got home at 1800, exhausted. Have taken things easy this evening.
Heard from Michele this evening. They're back from New York but Bryn hasn't been well and has, in fact, been taken into Wythenshawe hospital because he was having breathing difficulties. I'm fairly sure this is down to the excitement and pace of life in NY and the pressurised cabin plus jet lag on the way home and that he'll make a rapid recovery. Fingers crossed for him everyone please. But at least if I'm going to visit I know my way there...!
And that's all I've got for you at the moment bunnies. Quiet day tomorrow followed by a secret trip out tomorrow evening which I can't tell you about until I've been. Watch this space... :-) J x
6 comments:
It's very humbling that 'friends' are top of your list.
I'm delighted (and not a bit surprised) at your clear headed trajectory; having plans and keeping focus is excellent.
You're always top of my list.
fig x x
Well, darling, looking at what you have managed to pack into the last few years, and the fun you've had, and the friends you've made, I'd say your list of things to do seems eminently achievable.
As to the blog, what a good idea to keep it as a remembrance of you - warts and all, or perhaps vodka and all? And a pity we didn't have any video diaries of your more outrageous exploits to put on it.
A very dear friend of mine who suffered from a degenerative brain disease went to China for some stem cell treatment. He was there for a month with his family and they took many videos of him, charting his progress there (singing rude songs and dressing as Widow Twanky), and downloaded them onto YouTube. Ultimately they were also downloaded onto CDs and handed to people at the knees-up after his funeral (which was hysterically funny and immensely moving at the same time). So perhaps we could do something like that? The video bit, I mean. So, are you ready for your close-up, Mr de Mille?
'...singing rude songs and dressing as Widow Twanky...'
Even if he objects, THIS has to be done. I mean we can have a bucket list too right?
Definitely! I seem to remember a plan for a birthday party which involves a song from the Mikado and dressing up at the Valkyries...and that was without vodka..or even red wine
Hi J, looked up about how long your blog will out there and.....
The answer is "forever".
Blogger accounts and Blog*Spot addresses do not expire.
http://blogging.nitecruzr.net/2006/12/your-blog-is-forever.html
http://help.blogger.com/bin/answer.py?answer=41931
There is no requirement to publish, at any minimum rate. Once in ten years is just as valid as once daily, for ten years.
http://blogging.nitecruzr.net/2009/07/precedence-and-uniformity-justify.html
Thanks for that Maggie. Well done. :-) J x
Post a Comment