Is The NHS Missing A Trick?

So, my experience tells me that vodka is an effective painkiller.  Beyond that it is also a mood enhancer and depressant and so keeps me happy and quiet.  And some of it is cheap.  Would the NHS not be better just dispensing some cheap Netto vodka on the wards (you can't tell the difference - trust me, I know) rather than going for heavily researched, expensive analgesics? 

Just imagine each ward as its own little cocktail bar.  Nurses would still wear aprons to approach patients but they'd be bar-staff aprons rather than those horrible flimsy plastic things.  I think this would solve a lot of the NHS's problems (apart from not having enough competent, well-trained, well-supported managers of course). Patients would naturally fall asleep rather than be awake all night screaming. We'd all be quiet and compliant in the mornings as we recovered from hangovers.  

I think I should be tweeting the Health Secretary. But maybe I'll just sleep on it for tonight....

Radiotherapy in the morning with the lovely Jim. I'll let you know how it goes. I think it is starting to affect me now though.  Goodnight all. J x