Can You Smell Fish?

So here I am stuck in the middle of bloody nowhere and New Tricks is on the telly. How on earth anyone can watch that load of tripe is beyond me but I long ago gave up trying to understand the telly viewing habits of the Aged Ps. They're even getting excited about some new cricket stuff coming up soon. How is that possible now we know they're all corrupt? It really is beyond me.

Anyway, I've retreated to my bedroom with the computer and I've been reading some blogs and comments from way back when this all started. And at one point people started blogging jokes - I must have been depressed or something? Maybe I had cancer? Who can remember... but anywho there's a joke about budgies and smelling fish (thank you Newcastle Wench) and I've just realised that I don't understand it. Can anyone explain? Ta. That's all. J x

The South West

Arrived in Cornwall to spend a few days with the Aged Ps looking at gardens and St Ives. We're staying in a gorgeous cottage not far from the Eden Project and the weather, so far, has been lovely. And according to the BBC this morning we may well get away with relatively dry weather. Fingers crossed. The cottage also has free wi-fi - hurrah - and so I should be able to keep you updated with news. Only news at the moment is that DD has landed safely in Minorca and is about to enjoy a free holiday she managed to blag whereas my friend Karen (originally from Scotland, now in Brighton) has managed to gain a temporary promotion to Grade 7 so well done her. That's all. J x

Someone left my cake out in the rain...

Really? How likely is that? Have you baked a cake? And then have you left it outside and forgotten about it? And then its rained. I don't think so. It is a sublime song though. Been to some bars with DD tonight. Big mistake. As always. But I love it and I love her.... That's all. J x

The Day After

So the party was a huge success. Thousands of people. Hundreds of cocktails. Canapes to die for. And a barman who turned up at the door in a soaking wet shirt that clung rather alluringly to him and through which you could see his tattoos. My head hurts today though. Thank you to everyone who came. Hopefully I wasn't rude to anyone. I shall post some photos (if I can remember how to do it) once I get them from the official photographer. I believe there may even be a dvd...! Huge thanks to my party organiser for making it all run so smoothly. That's all. J x

Party Minus One

Well, the flat looks good. And all this rain is washing the terrace. Now all I have to sort is the music - and wouldn't you know it but my iPod chooses this moment to play up. Hey ho. These things are sent to try us... Bed time soon because Frau Party Organiser arrives dead early to make me do loads of last minute things. Oh and my bloody tuxedo doesn't fit because I'm a fat bastard! So its jeans albeit not George at Asda jeans... That's all. J x

Update

The little orange munchkin thinks my flat is the nicest one in City South (he cleans others apparently). I agree. But I bet he says that to all the boys! That's all. J x

Party Minus Two

So, 2 days to go. And my flat is being cleaned by the smallest, campest, orangest gay munchkin one has ever seen! He seems fairly efficient though. Apart from that there's still loads to do and yet my party organiser extraordinaire sails though it all serenely. We've had to change bar staff - the original mixologist has dislocated his shoulder. The replacement seems good though. He mixed me a martini last night that was very tasty indeed. Drinks have been ordered from Asda. Panacea are supplying the glasses (this will truly be a mixed bag party...). Its a shame I won't have my additional wardrobe installed by the time of the party (see below) but c'est la vie.

In other news, London was fab although I'm not a huge fan of Legally Blonde the Musical (despite the fact that I appear to have been ear-wormed by omigodyouguys, one of the songs). Great to see Fig though and we're still best friends which is fab. He did tell me that he'd bumped into an old friend of ours from University days who I haven't seen for ages but he didn't give him my telephone number, just told him to look me up on Facebook. Of course I'd discontinued my Facebook page (never used it really) so now I've had to reinvigorate it just in case he tries to look me up. I hope he does. Would be great to talk to him again.

The wardrobe was a laugh a minute. Went to Ikea ready to purchase (superb staff by the way) only to find they didn't have all the bits and even the bits they did have couldn't be sold because there was a quality stop on them. And even if they could be sold the builder hadn't brought his roof rack for the car anyway! Complete farce. And still loads of stuff lying around the flat that should be in a wardrobe.

Incidentally, the spell check on my computer doesn't recognise the word Asda. And that's why I use an Apple computer... That's all. J x

In London

Been shopping (hurrah), seen the 4th plinth exhibition (I like the enormous blue cock) and now taking a well earned rest before meeting up with young Figster for a night of jollity, musicals and... well, lets leave it there shall we? What else could one possibly want? J x

To London

Off to London. Legally Blonde, Fig, Dover Street... could it get any better? Will report back soon. J x